2015 feels overwhelmingly like ‘unfinished business’ to me. I accomplished a lot, but fell short just enough to leave me feeling unsatisfied with the year that was.
My resolution for 2016, is to feel the opposite of what I feel today. In one year’s time, I wish to take a few minutes to myself, with a pint at my side, writing about how grateful I am for the year that was.
And so what needs to happen?
Stability for one. The career has had many ups and downs over recent years. I think back to who I was before I left Regina, and I feel like I lost a skip in my step. A confidence. I felt like I could accomplish anything I set my mind to. Somewhere along the way, that feeling became something closer to ‘troubled optimism’.
Perhaps it was all an illusion to begin with, and I’m only just seeing reality now. I left the pond that was the Regina film industry, and jumped into the ocean that is Toronto. Never bothered to draw up a plan or pick a direction. I figured I could just show up and things would work out.
So many worthy and talented artists struggle in Toronto. Who am I to think I could just show up and expect it to all just fall in my lap?
The first three years of my time in Toronto were spent learning some hard lessons. My fourth year – 2015 – is the year I began to put all those hard lessons to good use.
I wrote a dynamic and marketable TV Pilot in Machiavelli & Tymes. I backed that up with a rich and well-researched spec script for The Blacklist. I took sole credit for three episodes, and made significant contributions to three other episodes of The Riderville Radio Sitcom. I was hired to write a pitch bible and TV pilot for an animated SciFi series. I completed two drafts of a TV Movie. Taken together, that’s over seven hours of content – three of which has been produced!
In 2016 I want to see my TV movie go into production. I would like to direct that movie. In addition, I aim to research the market a bit more thoroughly, then write two more TV movies for that market. I have a couple good ideas for TV pilots as well.
It’s an ambitious set of goals I admit. Possibly even a bit naive to express in writing. Putting a show into production requires the help of many others, and it’s a goal that even more wish for their own scripts. Still, if one doesn’t commit, one doesn’t really have a direction.
In times past, I’ve expressed the notion that life is a river – that we are leaves floating upon that river, and with great awareness and a pinky flick’s worth of effort, we can ride that river right up to where we’re supposed to land.
I continue to believe there’s something to that idea, but I may have been delusional in the balance between effort and awareness.
While production is a collaborative effort, requiring the commitment of many others, I need no one’s help to write a script. Nothing gives me greater satisfaction than crafting a great scene.
If I am to feel great about the year ahead, then I simply need to go out and write that ending.