PJ phoned me today, “Happy Exerversary!”
Seventeen years ago we walked down the aisle. Though we are now divorced, I consider marrying her one of the best decisions I ever made. I wandered through my 20’s with her. Made a beautiful little girl with her. Learned much about myself with her. Gained many priceless memories.
From my vantage point, outside my Toronto bachelor pad next to Bacia’s table, with four decades’ worth of experiences under my belt, it feels like a lifetime ago now. I think back to those days, and I barely recognize myself. I had a house, a garage, a yard, a sister-in-law living in the basement, and ‘couples things’ to do.
Sometimes you can look back on the past and gain insight into the future. I’m not sure I want to make those kinds of extractions for myself. A condo in The Beaches would be nice. Seeing Jazzy whenever I want would be outstanding. But a wife? A family?
I have things to do first.
In some ways I have a lot in common with my past. Just as I was at 23 years of age, I am now, starting my life anew. I find myself listening to myself better now, taking my career in a different direction, in a very different city. Where once I sought complexity and the trappings of importance, I now live for the solitude of simplicity – which I’m still getting a handle on.
PJ also finds herself beginning life anew. She’s moving back to Vancouver with Jazzy and Kieran to finish her PhD. She’s still figuring things out with Deni. Where she winds up a year from now is anyone’s guess. I don’t think she’s in a great hurry to figure that out.
I could say the same for myself.