A thought bubble splattered overtop my mind this morning as I sat with my coffee in my hand, gazing out the window. In one simple burst, a whole year’s worth of self identity simply popped – it came with a metaphorical sound – and I’m left naked with a simple truth.
I want to develop and produce my own TV shows. I want to write them. I want to direct them.
When I moved to Toronto, it was after turning my back on a whole big part of my professional experience. I no longer wanted to be a ‘producer’ and ‘directing’ fell a long ways off my radar screen. I wanted to limit my ambitions to writing drama and comedy for television. Still do – but not at the expense of everything else I do well.
This is not ego. This is acceptance. This is looking back and seeing what all my history adds up to. I’m embracing it, and I believe I’m coming to it from an honest place. I am being careful to NOT confuse business with personal identity.
To this end, I’ve been developing a documentary series. It’s on a topic I’m passionate about and experienced in. I have connections I can exploit. I will know within six weeks if it has legs. That, I suppose, is the best part. Sometimes projects can tease you with their potential until you become disillusioned. This one will either go into production in March, or it will go on the shelf for a year. Very simple. No in-between.
In the meantime, it’s become time to look at everything else I have on the shelf. The world economy is in a better place from when I last set out to pitch projects. Broadcasters are buying again. Why not dip my toe in those waters to see how far the ripples may travel?