Living Vicariously Through the Past

I’ve been spending a lot of time reliving old memories as I work with the Bucharest footage in the edit suite.  The fleeting moments of each memory have been captured in that footage, and as I work through it, frame by frame, over and over again, I can’t help but feel sentimental.  Bucharest is a special place for me, with a handful of special special people whom I’ve crossed paths with.  Of course Laura is there too.  Time has been frozen in that footage, and yet life has gone on for everyone, including me.

I’m not one who enjoys dwelling in the past.  I understand that every thing, every circumstance, every individual, is in constant motion.  It all moves forward and unfolds in unpredictable ways, and hanging onto the past will only lead to disappointments as the future unfolds.  Life is best lived when you ride along.  It’s like floating in a raft upon a rapidly moving mountain stream and the only thing you can do is nudge it gently towards one bend or the other.  You can’t stop, and you can’t go backwards.

Yet here I am, working in a bubble, in the edit suite, with the ghosts of all those moments trapped in the past.  I’ll permit myself the luxury of contradiction.  Life is full of those too.

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